events.

Now that I've gotten out my thoughts (refer to "finding mollie.") I can freely write of my crazy life:

I'd first like to mention how serious I am

right now- I've made myself tea,

a sammich, put a korean movie on in the background

(hello, M

ollie Bieber), and grabbed some chocolate. Shiz

goin' dooooown, y'all.

I'll start with Saturday, January 29th- the day I changed host families. My new family consists of my 'rents, Luc

and Etike, and 3 host sisters- Noemie 16, Jade 14? and Fany 9? They are all so wonderful and lovely and I am soo happy here. oh, and we have 3 sheep in the backyard :)

They're very musical and crafty and I feel so at home.

Jade took me on a little walk to show me around the village and it was beautiful! The sun was shining, the birds were out, and she told me stories of the family- she is darling.

The house was freezing for a week or so- they're doing some remodeling and were having new heaters put in. But, we survived and are happily toasty now :)In the meantime I taught Fany a song I would play with my siblings on the piano. It was so cute, she was so excited to play it and we showed the grandparents and all. It was a duet so it was fun to trade parts, too.

Wednesday the 2nd was Chaudeleur. In brief, it's the day you are supposed to make crepes and flip them holding a coin while making a wish to have good luck year round.

We had a lot of fun flipping crepes :) :) :) Fany took photos with my camera and we all took turns flipping. I was so scared!! They had to count me into it. Give me a break, aiight? I'm an expert now. My host mom was doing it with her eyes closed. Skillz.

Friday the 4th of February I went to Bruxelles with my class from school. It was such a long day, but it was interesting. We went to a museum with a special on Magritte. Some students had presentations on different artwork so we would plop down and listen to their analysis. That night we went to a theatre to see "Dieu es un DJ" or "God is a DJ". It was so weird.

I wore fairly new boots that day and had blisters on the back of my feet, but it was worth it.

Through the card games and laughter, it was fun.

Saturday the 5th of Feb I went to Margaret's house to celebrate Mallory's 19th birthday! (old fart).

It was such a wonderful evening. We were going to go out to a party, but

after shopping at the store to get food we decided we wanted to stay in and eat. Far more rewarding. We made Shrimp Scampi (fondly referred to as "scampi scampi" after I realized scampi was not the word for shrimp in french...awkward. It's crevette in case you're curious.)

It was so deliciousssss. We felt so mature and cultured. We brought wine to drink with our meal and we were home alone so we had the music going, laughter ringing, and just good 'ol girl time. We even tried to make Mallory homemade icecream but it wasn't as smooth since it was hand turned...the cake was nice though :)

I really love these girls.

I couldn't have made it this far without them by my side.

We also booked our trip to SPAIN!!!! 6 days in

May just the three of us at a resort in Costa Blanca? somewhere beautiful and waaaaarm. SO EXCITED.

Friday the 11th I went into town to get some makeup and met up with Mallory for a couple hours. When I got home my host family picked me up from my bus stop and we went out to a Moroccan restaurant. It was yum yum yummmy!

Saturday the 12nd we spent the day running errands and we tried to get my borro

wed clarinet to work- but it's just too old. It was funny because the guy at the music store was an exchange student in Texas when he was younger. It's crazy how small the world is.

That night I went to a party for the seniors of a school with my host sister and we had a nice time dancing and socializing. Belgium is greeeeat.

Sunday the 13th we had a late Christmas dinner with my first host family and their extended family- cousins, grandparents, etc. I was stuffed beyond belief and came ho

me with a new scarf, and heart shaped frame. The reason we had it in February was because we were snowed in at Christmas and it was the first weekend every one could make it.

Monday the 14th (Valentines day) was nothing special, but thaz cool- it's just a day.

I did have a deeper moment while watching Scrub

s (ironic?). He had a line that made a lot of sense "I think once you stop fighting it, time is on your side and you can really start to enjoy being who you are". So true for all ages. Little kids wanting to grow up quickly and not realizing the joys of youth, my time in Belgium- especially at the beginning where I wanted things to happen quicker, the aging people dreading hitting the next decade and missing out on wonderful memories. I made a silent goal to be at peace with time, and I think I've held to it so far. I am so happy to be here and am letting things happen as they may. It's much more peaceful.

Tuesday the 15th I was surprised with a Valentine's package from Katie. :) :) :) :) :)

I nearly squilled with delight when I saw the conversation hearts. My favorite candy evrrrrr. Along with Swiss Miss hot chocolate, cute earrings, heart socks and a sweet note. Love my sister.

Saturday the 19th there was a Carnival party organized by the Scouts in my village. Barely anyone showed up because there

was another party in Liege, but it was so much fun! I managed to put together a cowgirl outfit and spent the night dancing with an invisible lasso and horse. It was hilarious. The DJ kept yelling "yeee-haw!" I was proud.

I don't remember which day it was, but I gave a presentation in my french class (our english literature equivalent) on a Baudelaire poem. I had help analyzing it at home with my host mom, and the night before my presentation my host family gathered up in the living room so I could practice going through it. We ended up stay awake until 11pm talking about the poem, what he meant, and working on pronunciation. It was such a wonderful moment. I remember going to bed with this huge grin on my face. I'm here. Speaking french. Analyzing poems.

Sunday the 20th I went to Liege to meet Margaret/Mallory/and Marge's REAL mom! We went to a chinese restaurant around the corner from the gare. It was so nice to have girl time, chat, and have a mama. love love loves it.

Tuesday the 22nd I ended the day by playing Taboo with my host family. I did it in french of course, but my host family did it in English. It was hilariousssssssss. We had dictionaries out and everything. It was a great excercise, and we had a lot of giggles- like when my host dad was trying to say "ship" but I heard "chip" and my host mom heard "cheap". So so so so so much fun. I love them.

Wednesday the 23rd I had a rotary meeting with my host club. My president came 30 minutes earlier than I thought he would and we were over an hour early for the events, haha. It was a special evening this time- we went to a church nearby to have a little tour. It was baroque and honestly it was really ugly. But you know, a la mode in it's own time.

Afterwards we went to this little manor where a there were a 100 or so people. My host club was giving money to 5 different organizations: people with disabilities, homeless, blind, etc. They had me present a check- it was fun :D

The evening was soooo long. We didn't start eating the main meal until 9:30pm. I wish they had told me it was going to be a special evening because I didn't bring my camera :( However, there were professional photographers there so I'm going to figure out where to find the photos.

There was a brazillian girl there who was an exchange student 5 or 6 years ago. I love it when I get to speak french with someone with a different mother language. It is just so interesting to have a mediating language! We talked about exchange student activities and laughed at how we still have the same meeting spots/chants/and activities. Such long traditions!

Thursday the 24th my host mom let me sleep in as I got home around 1am. Thank goodnessss. I slept in and watched some movies/read some of my book/relaxed/caught up on my housekeeping.

Finally, you are up to date.

Tomorrow I will be getting up early to go to Luxembourg with Rotary and all the exchange students. It's an orientation type thing for the new southern hemisphere students. It'll be nice to meet everyone.

Then I'm spending the night at Mallory's with Margaret :)

Things in store for March:

party party partiessssssssssss. seriously, every week there is a party. We don't have school the 7th-11th and I will be going to the Ardennes and Amsterdam/Delft! Then the weekend after that my host club is taking me to the Czech Republic. SO EXCITED!!!

Then the weekend after that there is a Electronic Music Festival in Brussels and I think I'm going to hit that up. DJ's are booked until 5am...wooooooo!!

March, you are going to be great.

Things not event related but nice:

I love how whenever I walk home from my bus stop I can hear church bells in the distance. Mainly because it's always around the hour or half-hour. But it's still lovely. I see all the hills and european homes and breath in this crisp air. It's about a 10 minute walk and I have some time to myself. I walk by a little cemetery and I always pay some respect and say something nice, even if it's in my head.

The other day I was on the bus into town and a couple was sitting near by speaking English. We had a nice little chat and then I went on my way. I love how I meet the most random people.

Speaking of random people, my school hosts little exchanges and a girl from Germany was in my class for 2 weeks. I knew what it was like to be all alone so I talked to her whenever I saw her and ate lunch with her sometimes. She was so sweet. We spoke english and french together. She was there to research different school systems. We exchanged emails and I just received one from her yesterday :) I love having friends in the most random of places. She has a picture of us so I'll ask if I can post it later.

I was talking to some boys in my English class (but they are Belge and we were speaking french) and they were asking me how much a certain car would cost. I had no idea so I tried to jokingly say their firstborn child... they didn't understand my humor. Oh well, I laughed.

I taught my host sisters frisbee, and my host dad gets a big kick out of "ultimate" frisbee. We found out that it's huge in Bruxelles. yessssss.

Also, I need a haircut so badly. The other day during spanish I braided my hair and somehow made a GIANT knot. I couldn't brush it out and was forced to cut it out. I'm serious. It was a huge wad of hair. Ay yi yi.

Alors, I feel much better now that I can cross this off my list of things to do.
SO until the next time I summon the patience to write-

RUVZ YOU.

-Moll

finding mollie.

I've had the most amazing week/month/time.

I will get to catching up with the basics, but I want to get out my excitement for life first.

Since the new semester started I started showing up in the 1st years' art class. They're

around 10 or 11 years old and really sweet. It's the only year art classes are offered to students at the school which is why I'm with them.

In my normal classes I don't really follow the courses, I'm just kind of there. So being in a class where I can actually work on something

was a huge excitement, not to mention I've been spend

ing the last 6 months in study hall doodling

and missing nights at home, sitting in my corner with all the lights off save for one lamp in the corner, and painting with big band music playing.

Anyway, since starting the class I have felt happier than ever. The teacher is a wonderful woman and she has actually been helping with my french- quite a difference from teachers who just ignore you.

My first project was to draw faces of different moods and concentrate on using the eyes and eyebrows to express the mood. It was really fun and actually a challenge. After I had completed it she had me go through and re

ad the word, working on my pronunciation.

The second project was branched from the first- making a mini comic using the techniques of expressing emotions through the face. Already being used to making mini comics for my friends at home during school, I was

incredibly excited to do this.

I took the advantage to practice my french and wrote a little story about a flame-breathing

dinosaur coming to destroy Seraing (the village where I go to school) and a boy wanting to befriend him.

It was cute and the teacher LOVED it. It was also nice because I had some kids in my regular classes help me with grammar and it was a fun bonding experience. There a

re a couple spelling/grammar errors I have yet to fix, but it's nearly finished.

My third project was a pointillism project- making a design only by tiny dots. We had to make a scenery and my teacher was really enthusiastic about mine.

I blended the sunset really well and she had the students come gather around and look at it.

Now my 4th project is designed to teach students how to contrast warm and cold colors to make shapes pop out or recede . The other students (mind you they are young) would draw squigleys and color

a square behind it in it's contrasting color, but I had already done something like this in my notebook during study hall and so I pulled it out to get some ideas for my project. My teacher was doing her rounds and came over to see how I was doing. She saw my notebook and nearly screamed. She kept saying, "c'est magnifique!!" and asked to look through it. I was kind of embarrassed because there were a lot of random doodles and pages of lyrics where I didn't feel like thinking so I wrote whatever song I was listening to- but she kept raving about it. During the class a guy she knew came in to give her posters of his dance recital to put up in her room and sister's cafe. She brought him over and they discussed my work- then the prefect of studies came in to chat and (luckily) she didn't remember me (I'm not exactly following my schedule...) and was also really amazed by my art/doodling. My self-esteem was getting a major pump, guys. I felt so good. OH, and when she introduced me she also said I spoke french really well :) :) :)

(I need to erase the pencil and add color->

But what happened next I can't even explain how wonderful it felt. My art teacher gave me a speech about the importance of continuing with my artwork. She was saying to me that she could tell I was happier and that everything I have created came from inside me- it was technical or mimicked, it was me. She was saying I was a natural artist and to really be

happy in life I needed to continue drawing, even if it is just for myself. I was telling her how much I love it and miss painting and she was like "Painting?! I teach painting all day Monday. You can come every day to my class, I think it's something you really need." She gave me her master schedule so I can come whenever, no questions asked. To hear her say I'm welcome as long as I wanted to come was such an honor. I really really really enjoy the atmosphere and feel like myself again. I have confidence in my art and I haven't

felt so proud in a long time.

After saying there two hours I went to the study hall for another two hours to wait until my host sisters finished school. I kept working on my piece listening to my music and thinking about what she had said. As my new favorite song came on (New Soul by Yael Naim- listen to the lyrics) I felt myself smiling and feeling like my soul was radiating in bliss. I don't know how it clicked, but I realized that I had finally found myself. I know who I am. What makes it even better is that I love this person I've become.

I came here hoping to reach this moment, expecting myself to be like the women I have looked up to in the novels I've read. Independent and strong, courageous and loving. But now that I've reached this I realized I always knew who I was- I was just ashamed to admit it. I was too scared of people not liking me for who I am that I hid behind conformity. Also not realizing that those closest to me already saw through it all and found me.

At the beginning of my exchange I was much more closed off than I have ever been. It was hard to express myself- especially since I felt guilty if I spoke English. But my environment has changed and I feel so at home.

My counselor described my personality as "pow-pow-pow!" yesterday when I was talking about how much I love my new family and how I'm thriving. His reasoning was that I have a personality that is easy to get along with, "pow-pow-pow" was given with hand gestures to indicate I'm an energetic person. To hear him say that was so heart-warming. I was so weighed down with fear at the beginning of my exchange and now have learned to relax and be comfortable with my progress and where I am.

At the rotary meeting yesterday I presented checks to different charities and I didn't have a nervous bone in my body. I was so at ease and happy to be there, speaking french, enjoying free wine, and feeling my cheeks ache from smiling. Before I would have sweaty palms and was scared to talk to the Rotarians- nervous they were judging my french. But I realized they were happy I wanted to be there and try to speak their language, not judging how well I was doing. It was such a wonderful time. Granted, I did get home around 1am on a Wednesday night. Kcooool. No school today for Mollie :)

Bisous from the Kansas girl in Belgium, over-flowing with love of life

Moll

I promise to update with my activities instead of deep thoughts the next time :)

in my defense, I've been one BUSY girl!